Aspie chick with a wild streak

 So, when I was in maybe 5th grade, I remember getting the movie soundtrack Free Willy for Christmas since I liked that movie when I was 10. Anyway, one of the songs on the soundtrack was performed by an R&B/hip hop band called Funky Poets. And I do remember listening to the song on soundtrack and I guess I always wondered what the guys from that group looked like. I thought when hearing them singing that song, "How Can You Leave Me Now", I thought one of the guys sounded kinda cute. So out of curiousity, I looked them up on the internet and on youtube, just to see what they looked like.It's too bad that they didn't get more recognition in the music business than what they did. They don't even have anything about them on Wikipedia. Anyway, when I looked them up on youtube, they don't have a music video for their song off that movie soundtrack. They do however have a couple of music videos by them on there, though. The one music video I like by them is ...

 Well, this all started this last fall in 2022. I noticed if I ate something sweet, the bottom left side of my mouth would feel sore and irritated. So I started making sure I was taking better care of my teeth. Eventually, the soreness in the bottom half of my mouth went away. But then it moved into the upper half of my mouth. I think it's when they had tootsie rolls at work and when I bit into one, my upper left molar was in a lot of physical pain. So after I'd brush my teeth, I'd also use mouth wash and then oral gel to get rid of the pain. Eventually the pain on that side of my mouth did go away as well, but then it came back on the right side of my mouth. Had to use oral gel after brushing my teeth and using the mouth wash as well. Then during the Christmas season, my mouth was no longer in any pain. And I thought that would be a thing of the past.  Unfortunately, I was wrong because in January this year, I had some egg rolls and some sauce to dip it in for dinner one n...

 Just feeling depressed. How could I go with being with someone for almost 11 years to them just being gone. I'm missing the life I had when Jason was still here. My life was so much more interesting when he was still here. Now it's just kinda dull. 8 years ago I go from living at home with parents to living on my own by the end of that year. And then 6 years later, I'm living on my own by myself again, after living with Jason for only 4 years only for him to pass away. I've never been legally married and already I'm experiencing life as widow. In some ways it's nice to have my own apartment to myself, but what I miss is having someone to come home to who I can talk to about how my day has been going and what I got to see and experience when the other person wasn't there. What I would like is to still be able to come home and share with him those things, and not have to find him drunk and passed out. And as I might have mentioned before, I miss him only bein...

 Ok, so I thought I should mention some of the positive things that have happened for both last year and this year. I know that the first 4 months of last year were probably the hardest I had to get through. At least things got more interesting as the year progressed as expected. When I think about the good stuff that happened last spring and summer, I think they might have been positive distractions from my grieving over Jason, as just a reminder that I can be happy again.  I got to go to the Milwaukee Zoo in March. In April last year, I got to go to the Autism Gala towards the end of April. In May and June I got to celebrate birthdays with some old friends. I think I need to make time to hang out with some of my old friends and get my old social life back. I ended up in a relationship with someone from my autism group meetings when I had met him 9 years prior. He's been very supportive and understanding of the fact that I was with someone before him for a very long time, onl...

 Well, it's now been over a year since the last time I've blogged on here. I really should blog more often about my life and what's new.It's just getting around to it that's been hard, lately. It's a sunny evening. On nice sunny evenings like this remind me of times when I would go for walks with Jason at this time of night at Frame park in Waukesha, WI, when we first started going together. Although it's now been almost 2 years since he's been gone, the grief still hits in waves. I will say, I'm doing a lot better than I was a year ago. Or at least I would like to believe that. Every now and again, I wish I could just go back in time and relive certain moments from when I was in better running shape and ran at those track meets in High School. I wish I could go back to when Jason and I used to go places together and he wasn't always getting drunk. I know some of the places we went and the things we used to do weren't always really all that e...